Same Ol Sighs

Sigh. What can I say to ease the burdens of my heart? What can I tell myself to let go of the pain? “It won’t be like this forever. You will eventually not be alone anymore. Great will come from this awful reality…”


I come here to my writing because I honestly don’t have anyone to talk to. Somehow or another, as tears wellup in my eyes and overflow down my cheeks, I feel a tiny relief with the words I type out. 

We’re told to talk to God, the Holy Spirit, Christ.. to ask Him to fill us with love, peace, strength, understanding… I feel like I’ve been asking for so long with no real answer.
How can I think anything but that God doesn’t think too highly of me? Sigh.

At least once a day I feel this void in my chest.. a reminder of my loneliness. 

Oh how I wish I were dead. I’m so over this life. I look forward to nothing but sleeping and being alone so I can cry by myself.

Why, why do they fucking say God won’t give you what you can handle?? Until when do I have to handle this? I almost wish I had the balls to off myself.  


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s